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 By Cecilia Alers, President & Chief Creative Officer of Cecilia Alers Consulting, LLC, an award winning marketing and advertising firm based in Melville, NY. She can be reached at 516.680.0219 and www.alersconsulting.com.
As I read the novel A Merger of Equals where I read all my books – at the gym on the bike, treadmill or elliptical -- I kept thinking to myself, I’ve been there – and there – but never there. I also found myself saying I wish I’d known that then or Oh, that’s what I needed! Let me explain.
A Merger of Equals by former big-firm lawyer Debra Snider is a novel that reads like a modern day Emily Post’s Guide to Proper Etiquette or the back page of Glamour Magazine’s fashion Dos and Don’ts.
For Jane, the young, ambitious, sarcastic college grad who wants to become a corporate star the list of Dos include:
- Do whatever it takes to win points at work – even if that means taking advantage of your old college sweetheart by bringing him to corporate parties because he’s from a rich and powerful family.
- Do get as close to corporate stars as possible and hope some of their stardust wears off on you.
- Do put a large chip on your shoulder and challenge everyone to knock it off.
Jane’s list of Don’ts include:
- Don’t look like a woman, act like a woman or aspire to be a wife.
- Don’t even think about having a personal life if you want to succeed in business.
- Don’t hesitate to take advantage of everything you loathe in a person if it will get you to coveted corporate position of “king.”
Fortunately, despite Jane’s Herculean efforts to sabotage her own success and happiness, she doesn’t succeed. She becomes a Corporate Star at the “Firm,” the only name ever used to describe a major financial services conglomerate like Morgan Stanley. And, once she does become a star, she decides to take a position in a “Company.” There, Jane’s chip on her shoulder begins to whittle away as she realizes the world is not made up of Gordon Gekkos but normal 9 to 5 type people who really do want work/life balance.
At the Firm, for example, no one arrives at work before 10 a.m. or leaves before 10 p.m.(I’ve been there.) At the “Company” people arrive around 8 and leave by 6 p.m.(I’ve been there.) At the Firm, Jane’s corporate companion Tyler, her former college sweetheart, who is from a “blue blood” family, gives her added points at the Firm’s social events simply because of who she knows. (I’ve seen that – never been there.) At the Firm, when Jane is sexually harassed by an obnoxious lateral new hire, he is ushered out of the Firm swiftly but never held accountable for his inappropriate sexual advances.(I’ve been there and seen that.)
 Then there’s Charlie. Charlie is an all American, rising corporate star. He does the right thing all the time, every time. He’s smart. His father is wealthy and powerful. He’s extremely handsome. He’s always proper and he never even thinks about marriage – until the risen stars at the Firm tell him “You should think about getting married.” “Really?” says Charlie. “Why?” “Because people will begin to wonder what’s wrong with you if you aren’t married after a while.” (I’ve seen that.) So, what does Charlie decide to do? He decides to pick the perfect wife. Someone who is smart, attractive and well thought of by the Firm but doesn’t work at the Firm. Who might that be? If you guessed Jane, you win!
So, in one of the most unromantic scenes I’ve ever seen in print, Charlie goes to his good friend Jane and suggests that they get married to each other. It would be good for both of them. Charlie has always been Jane’s number one fan. Jane has always been best friends with Charlie – although she never, ever thought of having sex with him even though he is extremely handsome, tantalizingly brilliant and the son of one of the world’s richest families – (I’ve never seen that!). Nonetheless, both Jane and Charlie are not newbies when it comes to doing whatever it takes to become a Star. So, they decide to have sex. Guess what – it’s the absolute best sex in the world. (Sorry -- I’m not telling you whether I’ve been there or not.) So, great sex, brilliant minds, beautiful people and a rising Star to catch.
| Debra Snider was a partner at Katten Muchin Rosenman in Chicago from 1989-1995, where she practiced in the securities, securitization and mergers & acquisitions areas. Previously she was Executive Vice President, General Counsel and Chief Administrative Officer of Heller Financial, Inc. in Chicago. | A Merger of Equals is a fun – albeit at times dry – novel that offers important and inspiring lessons about the nature of corporate competition, professional life and personal success. If I were you, I’d read A Merger of Equals and meet Jane and Charlie. I’d also do what I did – add up all the things in the book you’ve experienced, seen or wish you’d experience. Then I’d pass the book along to your favorite people and ask them to do the same. Once several of you and your friends have read the book, I’d gather around and compare notes. I think it would be kind of fun to see just how many people have experienced the truths of this book – but kept it hush-hush – because you were taught proper Emily Post Etiquette – if you don’t have something nice to say, don’t say anything.
Well, I do have something nice to say: Read Debra Snider’s A Merger of Equals. You’ll be glad you did.
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